Saturday, September 7, 2013

Baby Cannon

Preggo Observations
  1. If you're pleasantly plump don't expect a bump anytime soon
  2. You will never fully understand the meaning of exhaustion until week 6 through now
  3. Grapes are a good idea 
  4. Don't eat enough...you get sick. If you eat too much... you get sick. 
  5. Nothing helps nausea - not pepto, ginger ale, or tums. Brace yourselves.
  6. Don't expect your husband/significant other to even remotely understand the meaning of you not feeling good....because they won't.
  7. If you are nauseous and at this week you're prolly hungry or need to poo....trust me, just go sit on that toilet and wait...it'll come.
  8. Or from  #7 you're constipated... good luck with that.
  9. Your eyesight will change, and tiny writing on the TV, like football scores in the lower corner, will not be seen.
  10. Boobies grow fast. Be prepared.
  11. Dreams are very very...very disturbing sometimes
  12. Your hair will either fall out or grow awesome.
  13. Your nails will put Wolverine to shame
  14. If you got the baby glow, you lucky turd you. To you others who got acne and bacne and bad hair...I feel you. 
  15. Whether you don't need to tinkle while sitting down, you will as soon as you stand up, like bad, you better hurry.
  16. Getting ultrasouds hurt like the devil when you are plump because they got to get through your extra layer of insulation. And they don't care if your hipbone is there or not!
  17. Drink water as often as you can...it actually helps everything.
  18. No matter how much water you drink, you'll get a headache from hades that'll last days and days and days...
  19. You won't crave anything good for you...unless you are just one of the lucky ones. Other wise it's anything from cake to cheese-its, and gold fish.
  20. No matter what, everything will be worth it in the end.

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